Addictions and Answers
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Armies long ago learned a practical solution to that problem. Group morale - esprit de corps. Give recruits a uniform and a number, strip them of the superficial marks of who they used to be. Put them through the intense rigors of basic training, hardships they suffer equally, and together. You’re in the army now. Group morale buoys them up, loyalty to an entity bigger than themselves, an identity stronger than they ever felt on their own. They become bonded as a regiment, a company, a squad. “Run up on that beach and take out that machine gun emplacement!” is the order. Group morale heartens them, keeps them going even in the face of death. They run up on the beach and take out the machine gun nest. One of the rules for newcomers to AA is the injunction to make 90 meetings in the first 90 days. An effort to build identification with the group as quickly as possible. A very sound idea. But rehabs do the same thing in 28 days, and do it, in my experience, more often, more lastingly. The intensity of the live-in experience changes your perception of who you are. No longer are you someone fighting addiction on your own. You’re one of a huge, successful fellowship, an army of people who’ve won over booze and drugs. Esprit de corps. Why do women who would never think of going into a bar by themselves, enjoy going to male stripper joints like Chippendale’s when they’re in a gang? Think of going to a football game by yourself. It’s OK, but not too much fun. Now think of going to the same game with a gang of friends, all rooting for the same team. An entirely different experience. It’s a kick, and you want to do it again. Nor does group morale affect only the people in the stands. Hard-headed bookies in Las Vegas factor it in when figuring the odds. Is the team playing at home, with thousands of partisan fans cheering them on? Call it “momentum” and it plays a role in who wins the game down on the field. I’ve known people who kicked booze, pills, drugs - name your vice - on their own. It can be done. But it’s lonely work, and not much fun. Going to a rehab for 28 days, away from everyone you know, and stripped of all marks of who you used to be, is like going to 280 AA meetings in 280 days. The intensity of the live-in experience maximizes the odds in your favor, speeding up group morale, the bonding process which 25 years of sobriety tell me is at the heart of staying sober and enjoying it too. P.S. If you find yourself asking can I afford the time, can I afford the cost, ask yourself this. How much money have you spent on your addiction? How much time have you lost pursuing chemical pleasures? How much is the rest of your life worth? If you still say you can’t afford to go, ask yourself the next question: do you really want to get sober? |
Q: I’ve been slamming heroin since I was fourteen and have the jail time to prove it. You sound like a know-it-all on the radio, but you’re just an old-timey drunk. Your experience is totally different from mine. What makes you think you have anything to say to me? Click here for the answer Q: When we have arguments, my husband says it is because I’m an alcoholic. He says a lot of hidden anger comes out after I have a drink or two. My feeling is that he doesn’t think it proper for ‘a lady’ to drink at all; he is very old-fashioned. I tell him if he’d drink with me, we’d get along better. But when I am alone with my thoughts, sometimes I think maybe he is right. How can I know if I’m just an occasional heavy drinker, or an alcoholic? Click here for the answer More to come |
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Last Update: 3/5/2001
Web Author: The Rainbow Company
